'Allotment and leisure gardener' was its name.
Anyone who kids themselves that gardening is a leisurely pursuit is guilty of one or more of the 'sins' I'm about to share with you.
Last year, a survey revealed the 10 biggest gardening faux pas. Apparently, gardening is the new frontline in the battle for social status as shown by the startling fact that 55% of us think negatively of neighbours who don't keep their gardens in check...
Only 55% of us?
So what are these crimes? Lets count them down...
At 10 - Mock Grecian statues
If it's good enough for the Romans?
In at 9 - Astroturf rather than real lawn
Astroturf has a bad name, all those sliced shins from hockey and football of my youth. But if you can't be bothered to push a lawnmower then you really shouldn't be allowed a garden!
Slipping 2 to 8 - Children's toys permanently left out
Have you ever tried to get your kids to clear away their toys? Exactly. Harsh call.
New entry at 7 - Completely paving a garden
If Astroturf screams laziness, this probably needs a call to the cops
Up one to 6 - Half finished decking
Um, eyes bigger than your stomach?
Non mover at 5 - A dead lawn
Re-entry at 4 - Overgrown hedges
The classic returns, and no it is not cool to trim them in the shape of a cockerel. Or anything similarly named.
At 3 - Broken garden furniture
Seen the prices at B&Q? No excuse.
At 2 - Overgrown garden
Given the rain we've had, and my own recent experiences I think we need to cut our neighbours a little slack. Or casually rearrange the garden boundaries...
At Number 1 - Litter
Who litters their own garden? Who?! Someone elses maybe.
Is there anything missing from this list? What annoys you about the neighbours garden the most? Leave me a comment, I'd love to know! Mainly because I can't see over my wall and I need some garden gossip!
And whilst you do that, don the denim and have a bit of Quo