Monday, 7 January 2013

Status Woe

So there I was ambling down the hill when I saw a magazine lying atop a recycling box, calling out "pick me, pick me".

'Allotment and leisure gardener' was its name.

Anyone who kids themselves that gardening is a leisurely pursuit is guilty of one or more of the 'sins' I'm about to share with you. 

Last year, a survey revealed the 10 biggest gardening faux pas. Apparently, gardening is the new frontline in the battle for social status as shown by the startling fact that 55% of us think negatively of neighbours who don't keep their gardens in check... 

Only 55% of us?

So what are these crimes? Lets count them down...

At 10 - Mock Grecian statues

If it's good enough for the Romans? 

In at 9 - Astroturf rather than real lawn

Astroturf has a bad name, all those sliced shins from hockey and football of my youth. But if you can't be bothered to push a lawnmower then you really shouldn't be allowed a garden!

Slipping 2 to 8 - Children's toys permanently left out

Have you ever tried to get your kids to clear away their toys? Exactly. Harsh call.

New entry at 7 - Completely paving a garden

If Astroturf screams laziness, this probably needs a call to the cops

Up one to 6 - Half finished decking

Um, eyes bigger than your stomach? 

Non mover at 5 - A dead lawn

No comment...

Re-entry at 4 - Overgrown hedges

The classic returns, and no it is not cool to trim them in the shape of a cockerel. Or anything similarly named.

At 3 - Broken garden furniture

Seen the prices at B&Q? No excuse.

At 2 - Overgrown garden

Given the rain we've had, and my own recent experiences I think we need to cut our neighbours a little slack. Or casually rearrange the garden boundaries...

At Number 1 - Litter

Who litters their own garden? Who?! Someone elses maybe.

Is there anything missing from this list? What annoys you about the neighbours garden the most? Leave me a comment, I'd love to know! Mainly because I can't see over my wall and I need some garden gossip!

And whilst you do that, don the denim and have a bit of Quo


Anonymous said...

Clearly I am the only person alive who thinks astro-turf is superior to lawn

Anonymous said...

Reading your list, I think I might be one of those annoying neighbours - no astroturf, but there are a few patches of nettles left to grow for the butterflies. So I guess I can't really complain about other gardens! Interesting to see what bugs other people though.

The Hapless Kitchen Gardener

My photo
I only feel hapless because some people make it look easy to grow 10 ft marrows or a banquet of greens whereas my courgettes got nabbed by killer slugs and I only got one raspberry. So tips and stories from people less hapless than I are more than welcome. As a disclaimer though, none of my comments should be taken as expert advice on which you can rely! © Unless stated otherwise, and with the exception of guest content where that guest retains copyright, all photos and posts are the copyright of Tom Carpen and may not be used without permission.