Wednesday, 18 May 2011


A boss once told me, in a wise old tone, "it's easy to do things if you're motivated, it's when you're not motivated that's the real test".

What with taxes to pay, fear of terrorism and the Apprentice it's hard for a boy these days to remember to tend to his onions.

I have an onion dilemma. My red onions, planted in February are looking healthy on top and are teasing me just above the soil. That streak of glistening red hints at treasures below. But is it too early to harvest. Is it all suggestion and disappointment? Like padded underwear.

Well, the instructions say wait till the leaves die down in late summer / early autumn.

Want it, can't have it.

Necessity has seen my garden take a back seat for a whole week. Guilt aside, my recent time away from the blog has not been in vain. I've heard tales of a lemon tree grown from seed, seen my grandad's old greenhouse been reborn by my sister in law, and even given my dad some Pak Choi that he would always buy from the chinese supermarket well before it was famous. You hear that eh, my dad's more hip than your dad (do kids say 'hip' these days?.

Talking of kids, yesterday my ex's five year old showed me with such pride the nasturtium and gourd she and her school had planted. I'm of course all for kids growing their own and learning about it far more quickly than I seem to but no, I don't know what gourd is either. It sounds Victorian. Possibly used for torture.

So I've just tried google images. And now I'm worried about that primary school as for each picture of a squash-like veg, there is also something the modern tribal gentleman should never be without...

Be careful what you plant...

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The Hapless Kitchen Gardener

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I only feel hapless because some people make it look easy to grow 10 ft marrows or a banquet of greens whereas my courgettes got nabbed by killer slugs and I only got one raspberry. So tips and stories from people less hapless than I are more than welcome. As a disclaimer though, none of my comments should be taken as expert advice on which you can rely! © Unless stated otherwise, and with the exception of guest content where that guest retains copyright, all photos and posts are the copyright of Tom Carpen and may not be used without permission.